While on this soul searching that I have been doing, I have come to the realization that I have many different facets to my identity. What do I most identify myself as? Good question.
I would definitely say that now in this role as a mother, first and foremost, this is what I am identifying myself as. Having a helpless baby placed on my belly, after birthing her, has become my main focus. Being the best role model for my child is what I aim to do. I hope one day she says, “I want to be just like my mommy”. By no means am I anywhere close to the “perfect” mom, but who is?! I google, ask lots of questions, think I’m doing ok and then begin to second guess myself. But I love every minute of being a mom and I am so blessed to have the opportunity ❤️. It was a hard road to get here, but that is what makes motherhood even more beautiful.
By taking the oath of marriage, in front of all of our friends and family, made me a wife. I love the identity and partnership of marriage. We each have our roles, and while I am by no means a traditional housewife, I would like to think I’m somewhere between that and a working wife. Making dinners and doing laundry are things I enjoy, with some help! We are fairly even in chores and my husband is definitely the cook of the family. But I’m trying! Being a wife can make one very vulnerable at times, and having a husband who is both trustworthy and supportive makes my own vulnerability easier. Having that partner to sleep beside at night is a feeling of fulfillment. I have only been a wife for a mere 3 years, but it is something that I cherish.
I am the best sister one could ask for. Just ask my sister. I’m her fave. (And only!). Everyone should have a sister. They make the good times better and the hard times bearable. Without my sister, I don’t know where I’d be. And as a sister, I love the bond that has formed between us. It’s an unbreakable one for sure. It’s who I am. From the day my younger sister was born, I got to add being a sister to my life. Growing up, we fought like cat and dog! But with maturity and time we now don’t go a few hours without connecting! It’s both an honour and a privilege to be in this role.
I am very fortunate to have an abundance of friends to stand beside me in this life. The amazing thing about friends is that there are varying degrees of friendships. And by that I mean you have best friends and you have the friends you talk to or see once a year, if at all. And then there is all of the other friendships in between. I love and appreciate them all. But with every friend in my life, whatever paths we travel on, we know that we are always a phone call away. This is a very important part of my identity.
Being a Registered Nurse is something that I definitely identify with at this point in my life. It has been my profession for over 10 years. There are many positives and negatives to being a nurse. I’ve seen birth and death, happiness and sadness. I have dealt with many different patients, families and other healthcare professionals. Being a nurse has helped to mold me into the person I am today. There are experiences that I wish that I could “unsee” and others I will cherish all of my life. I feel that I am more compassionate and caring because of the nurse in me. And also maybe a bit more jaded and realistic then I used to be.
Part of my identity is being a woman. I am proud to say that I birthed my daughter. I have a strong shell when I need and am a softie most of the time. I love clothes, makeup and pampering! But I also love getting dirty, wearing sweatpants and watching hockey! I am definitely super emotional, cry at any sappy movie and take EVERYTHING personally! But it is me.
This is a tough one… I am an adult orphan, if you will. I have lost both my mother and my father . But I’m still their daughter. I had a mom and dad growing up. I was that rebellious pre-pubescent teen. I am sure that I gave my mom many grey hairs! But as I got older, I realized that my mom really only wanted what was best for me. And my dad and I became so close when he would drive me to my hockey games and help coach the team. They may not be on earth anymore, but I will never forget the life lessons my parents gave me. As long as I’m living my parents they will be!
Those are the six key roles that I feel make up my identity right now. Of course, there are many more layers to me. But those six are the highlights, the front and centre, of my self today!
If you are trying to figure out where you belong in this wild and crazy life, make a list! It really does hep to provide some insight to who you are.
XOXO Jo Jo